Hello, hello, hello, everyone, and welcome back to the Sunday Post here on Trauma Response. I know, just like last week I am forgoing a listicle in favor of another article, but this is my newsletter so I’m allowed to do whatever I want. I’m frantically writing this about 20 minutes before my friend from home is about to get off a train and Uber to my apartment, so I will try to keep this as clean and concise as possible. Today we’re talking about David Sedaris and the word “queer.” Let’s get to it!
I want to start by saying that, according to random people I’ve seen on Twitter, David Sedaris has allegedly expressed some other “problematic” opinions, separate from the one I’ll be discussing today, and those opinions have, again, allegedly been applauded by certain “problematic” groups of interest. I am not an expert on David Sedaris, I don’t read everything he writes, I don’t tune in to every interview he’s ever done, and I find his work interesting, but, that being said, I have not read one in probably over seven years. If he has expressed some other problematic opinions, I do not know about them, and the opinions I am about to give do not reflect the opinions that David Sedaris has allegedly expressed outside of the one discussed in this newsletter. Stupid, but I don’t want anyone on my ass.
Last Sunday, the 16th of October, essayist, and humorist David Sedaris appeared on CBS Sunday Morning, a daytime news show, for a brief segment where he declared that he is now straight. For those of you who know of David Sedaris, you might scratch your head at that notion because for as long as David Sedaris has been in the public eye he has been an out, gay man. But Sedaris isn’t really coming out as straight, not really. As he says in the segment, “I haven’t met anyone else, I haven’t fallen in love with a woman, I’m simply done fighting the word ‘queer.’” So, to all the women who briefly thought they’d finally have a shot to get with David Sedaris, I’m sorry to burst your bubble. He’s not any straighter than I am, he’s just, kind of, being an asshole.
David Sedaris continues the segment, commenting on how he is confused about what the term “queer” means, how it used to be a slur when he was growing up, and that, as he sees it, it appears that anyone can label themselves as queer, regardless of gender identity or sexual orientation. He’s being deliberately passive-aggressive, he knows that saying he’s “straight” will get people in a tizzy. And it’s worked, the people of Twitter are abuzz at how crazy, how ludicrous he sounds! I watched the Sedaris clip on Twitter and really thought nothing of it, I can understand why he would think the term is stupid, and I would understand, intellectually if not emotionally, why people would get upset over that.
David Sedaris is 65 years old, he was born in 1956, and, as he said on the Sunday Morning segment, queer meant something a lot different when he was growing up. “Queer” used to be a slur levied against LGBT people, and it seems like only within the past few years has the idea of “reclaiming” the word queer really come to the fore. Of course, there have been shows like 2003’s Queer Eye For the Straight Guy, its more insidious Netflix remake Queer Eye, and the British show Queer as Folk which was also remade later on. But the internet is a lot different now than when the UK’s Queer as Folk debuted in 1999, it’s even a lot more different than it was when Netflix’s Queer Eye came out in 2018, people all over the internet proudly label themselves as “queer,” and throw the term around as if it’s nothing to bat an eye over.
It’s not surprising that an older generation of gay people might flinch a bit when a word that was used to demonize them is suddenly being used casually. While I would firstly find it very funny, I would also find it very strange if suddenly people were saying “I’m a faggot and proud!” all over the internet and in the streets. It’s confusing to David Sedaris, I’m sure, how this word even managed to become a fine word to use, and I can’t possibly begrudge him as a gay man of a certain age for perhaps thinking that the word queer is still not an acceptable term to use.
But I also don’t really think David Sedaris’ issue was with the word itself. What David Sedaris is miffed about is the fact that apparently “anyone” can use the word to describe themselves. “I read an interview with a woman who identifies as queer because she’s tall, that’s it…” He says. His problem is that it’s an unspecific, umbrella term that is just ambiguous enough that just about anyone could make a case for being themself. Hot take, but I don’t particularly think he’s thinking the wrong things here. Similarly to what I wrote about in my queerbaiting article, David Sedaris, if I’m understanding him right, is worried about what the natural conclusion is to letting people from outside a closed community into that closed community regardless of whether they are truly members of it or not. David Sedaris is worried about what happens to the Gay Community, the Trans Community, the Lesbian Community, etc when people who are not really a part of those communities call themselves “queer” to gain access to them.
I don’t think Sedaris is wrong to be skeptical of the term at all. In an age where everyone is encouraged to label themselves with very straightforward things like “gay,” “lesbian,” and “bisexual,” it does seem a bit counterintuitive to introduce a purposefully ambiguous title that really anyone can claim to use. Because of its ambiguity, the word queer is about as meaningless as it is meaningful, it means everything, but it also kind of means nothing at all. Again, I can understand why an aged gay man would think that such a thing is absurd.
You can’t teach an old dog new tricks. People got so mad at David Sedaris for his Sunday Morning segment, but no one seems to be giving him the slightest bit of grace for his age. He’s a man in his sixties, new things confuse him, and he doesn’t need to like the term queer if he doesn’t want to. Yes, I think he was being a bit snotty in his interview by “coming out as straight,” but I think his segment highlighted something I think a lot of people need to accept: just as anyone has the right to identify themselves as “queer,” any other objectively queer person (like myself, for example) has the right to reject that label, and even be confused over it. You can’t force anyone to label themselves as anything. I get it, no one was forcing Sedaris to identify as queer, but you can’t force him to like the idea of the label either, and frankly, he doesn’t have to.
Well, that’s all I got for you. Thank you for joining me on yet another Sunday post, y’all get home safe now, y’here?